depression · mental health · Uncategorized

Thoughts to an ex who didn’t understand depression.

 It’s not easy being with someone with a disability, disease, or mental illness, I know. I was with someone when my depression was at its worst, when I was at my lowest low. He didn’t know how to handle it. He tried to tell me I had no reason to be so down, that there were people out there that are worse off – that I was fine.

These are not things you say to people who are suffering. Don’t ever tell anybody they have no reason to be depressed – ever. It’s one of the worst things to hear.

In my case, I started back on anti-depressants. I knew it would make me worse before I started to feel better within myself, and I was okay with that. The guy I was with at the time however, had a very different view, and was not happy with me taking them. He told me repeatedly to stop, told me they were the worst kind of drugs, and questioned if I really needed them. He had the same attitude when he found out I had been self-harming. His response being ‘that’s the kinda shit you do alone to feel better right?’

Depression is not something you can switch off. It’s a very real, debilitating illness that can take over your life. When someone is taking the steps to reach out and get the help they know they need – never discourage that, or make them feel about it for doing so. Never make them feel bad about getting help. It is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of great strength.

I know it can get tough, but the worst thing to do is make your partner feel even worse than they already do. Just support them, and be there for them when they let you, or when they need it. Listen to them and try to understand what they’re feeling if they open up to you.

Otherwise you’ll push them away, like my ex pushed me away.

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