Anxiety · depression · Uncategorized

Walking omen

Afternoon all, I guess I’m here to vent today.

I just feel really down, if I’m honest I feel like utter shit.

Yesterday evening I practically begged my dad to give me a lift to the local pub to meet some friends. About ten minutes after arriving, he calls me.

“Thanks.” he says. I ask what he means. He tells me someone has just crashed into him and ruined his car, which is my fault because I made him leave the house. He said if I just stayed at home it wouldn’t happened – it was all my fault.

I hang up, an immediate downer put on my evening, and tears brimming in my eyes. I felt sick.

He was right.

Now he has since apologised, and realised what he said was wrong and didn’t mean it. But I still can’t help but feel heavily guilty, and at fault. I do feel like a walking omen; I’m a figure of bad luck. Sometimes I think the world would be better off without me.

Emily dark thoughts:

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