Anxiety · Illness · mental health · Uncategorized

Let’s talk about drugs.

Okay. I need a rant about drugs.

Let me start by saying I am not in favour of them; I’m totally against them, despite everyone and their momma is doing it around me. I’ll always stick to my beliefs, no matter what. People have tried to pressure me into taking drugs, or smoking weed, and I don’t understand why they don’t respect the fact I do not like it, nor want to. I’m not a bad person for this, am I?

So my boyfriend is a weed smoker, and several of my exes have been too. Hence why they are exes. Partly.

I just don’t like it, I don’t like being around it/people doing it. My boyfriend took me to his friends house the other night, which is fine and all, but all they did was smoke up, and I’ve never felt so fucking uncomfortable in my entire life. He knows my views on it and how I feel about it, yet still thought it was okay. So now we’re in a sorta awkward place. Which I hate, but I just never want to be around that again. It’s not me, and it’s not my scene.

I know there are a lot of people out there that may give me hate for this, but I honestly don’t care. You can throw your arguments at me, great. You do you.

I’ve seen what it does. My uncle suffers from severe schizophrenia because of it. Having and seeing with my own eyes what it has done to him – it’s horrible. It’s heartbreaking. I don’t see him any more. I’ve not seen him since I was a child. There was a few times in my teenage years when he felt okay enough to come round, but nothing can prepare you for the sad awkwardness that follows. You don’t know what to do, say, or how to act around him. Any little thing may set him off. He locked himself away from his family, after spending years and years under medical care, he’s finally trusted to have his own place, but is still supervised.

I don’t know, I’m just really not into it. You can tell me it’s relaxing, that it will chill me out, but I honestly don’t care. I have my reasons, and to be fair I have my right. I shouldn’t be made to feel like I am the one who is in the wrong, am I?

Leslie Ann O’Dells’ Hauntingly Surreal Portraits Flourish With Beauty And Death:

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